So, I tried another dating site and for the first time since I tried online dating, I actually met a guy who I actually, truly and seriously was attracted to. Yet, so many problems: still married, with kids, still living at home while trying to divorce. I should have seen the signs, but I was blinded by the nice eyes, sweet smile and wounded demeanor. And here I am, a month later, waiting, stupidly, for the phone call, the text, some form of communication.
Friends keep getting married, having kids, living their lives and here I am, still in the same place I was 10 years ago. With 40 looming so close in the distance, is it worth it to bother trying another dating site. Honestly, what difference could it make when I think i am getting to the point where the guys are being recycled.
I had my chances, not with great guys, and maybe one really great guy-but I was too young and too unfocused to notice it.
Do I have regrets? Yes, but would I change anything? I don't know. I don't know if it would matter.
So here I write, streaming stupid words together to try and interpret this empty feeling I have in my heart. My dog helps, but it's still so very lonely. and what will happen when I'm alone without my mom or my friend ( I know lots of people, but really only have one true friend) to be there with me?
Boy, I really need a vacation.
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